Fireflies

As I walked my dog on this humid night, I watched as the trees, bushes, and grass were illuminated by fireflies. And in the quiet, as my eyes followed the flashing lights my mind took me back to a June night 24 years prior…

June 1994 a dark humid night, the radio playing quietly in the background. On that night I wasn’t walking though, I was in the passenger seat of a car. My mom was driving, my two sisters and my older sisters boyfriend, Jeremiah, were asleep and I was looking out the window as we made our way into the Midwest and then on into Ohio. Ohio our new home. A home I didn’t want to go. A home far away from our real home in California. Far away from my friends. Far away from my school. Far away from everything. Ohio a place I couldn’t even find on a map.

As we drove deeper into the humidity and closer to Ohio I watched as the bushes became illuminated by–I didn’t know at first–then my mom said, “Fireflies.” They were beautiful. It was about the only beauty I saw in this move…it wasn’t beautiful to take a 16 almost 17 year old away from all his friends in the middle of High-School. My older sister she was just coming to see our new home, she’d be going back to California with her boyfriend for college. My little sister. She was young. She could adjust. But me, my heart was broken.

I thought about that tonight as I saw the fireflies illuminating the night, and I said a prayer of thanks to The Lord for “breaking my heart” at 16 because it saved my life.

In Ohio, the home I didn’t want. I found the home I needed. A home I only lived at for three years, but it became the home I still claim. The home where I made my best friends. The home I named my eldest son after (Dayton). Most importantly the home I met Jesus.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding….” -Proverbs 3:5

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