If I’m honest I believed that when I had kids there would be certain things I would just stop doing, and certain things I would automatically start doing. Why? Because haven’t you heard, “kids change everything.”
While in many ways that is true, “kids do change everything,” there are many ways in which folk think their kids will change things, but ultimately, “Kids have changed nothing.”
Before I was a parent I said, “once I have kids we will have family worship every day.” Well I’ve had kids for four years now, and we don’t have family worship every day. We do read our boys individually the Bible each night, and we do pray with them many times throughout the day, but sitting down as a family unit for worship on a daily basis consistently, it hasn’t happened.
I’ve heard future parents say, “I’ll quit drinking,” “I’ll quit smoking,” “I’ll go to church regularly” etc., “once I have kids.” But I’ve discovered in so many cases like my example above, it usually doesn’t happen.
Grandparents will say, “I think you’ll see our kids a lot more involved in church once they have children of their own.” And yet so often this isn’t the case.
Why?
Because if a person is waiting for a kid in their life to change them, more often than not they aren’t going to change, at least not drastically!
If I could give expecting parents or folk that are contemplating having children one day a little advice: If you want to be different for your kids, then CHANGE NOW!
You see ultimatley kids can’t change us, we are inherently selfish, impatient, angst ridden individuals. Yes kids can temper those things some, but they can’t ultimately change us.
There is only one source of change and that is through Jesus Christ–
“For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior,” –Titus 3:3-6
It is not through a relationship with our children that any of us will be saved or changed, but through a relationship with Jesus our Savior.
Even if a person “changes” for the sake of their kids, if these “changes” are simply in the context of having children then these changes are deceiving and of no ultimate value. They are prosthetic changes
If the premise of an individuals changes are “their children” then that is not a change that is lasting it is in fact the height of hypocrisy.
The term hypocrite in the Bible came from the Greek word “hypokrites” which was an individual that was an actor, “playing a role” for another.
Isn’t a parent that sets standards and goes through the motion of being involved in church and practicing certain Judeo-Christian principles simply for the good of their children without truly embracing them in their own hearts are they not playing a role? Hypokrites? Actors?
How many parents have raised children being involved, active in the church, setting high standards in their homes, only to see their children go off to college or begin their own adult lives and those same parents are no longer involved in church, no longer practicing the standards they had practiced while raising their children? Was the change then through Jesus or the children, and if it was through the children then couldn’t we term that hypocrisy–playing a role for another?
And then the question has to be asked what is being communicated to the adult children, when the parents that had rasied them one way are living a completely different way? They’ll think their parents have changed, but the more probable reality is that their parents were never truly “changed from the inside out.”
I’m discovering in myself that I can’t change for my kids, nor can my kids change me. If I do change in these ways then it is just hypocrisy, it is what Jesus described to the pharisees as a whitewashed tomb, “beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness.” (Mt. 23:27)
Potential parents…
Expecting parents…
Parents of young children…
Parents of teenagers…
Parents of adult children…
Grandparents…
Let us all change…
Not for our kids…
Because we love Jesus!
“Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong. Let all that you do be done with love.” -1 Corinthians 16:13, 14
I grew-up a Lakers fan. For me most of my experience with enjoying my team came through the radio. You’d try and tune the radio just right depending on where you were in California to hear the classic game call of Chick Hearn and his transition of analysts from Keith Erickson to Stu Lantz. As I got older I began to be able to watch some Lakers games on television. In the late 80’s & early 90’s about half of the Laker road games were broadcast on KCAL channel 9. Before that the only Laker games that I was able to watch were the 3 or 4 a year that NBC broadcast on the Sunday National Game, oh & of course the championships since the Lakers were in the championship 9 out of 12 years in 80’s & early 90’s. But to move-up to about 20 games a year was fantastic.
Jump forward to 2012 at the beginning of this Lakers basketball season fans were up in arms, some were in hysterics. Why? Because there was limited access to Lakers games on television (until just yesterday). You see over the past two decades Lakers fans had been able to enjoy every single game that was played by their beloved professional basketball team on television–the limited coverage days of my childhood were gone and people now had total access. So when this year started and that accesss due to television contracts had changed people didn’t know what to do. They screamed, “it’s not fair” “this is not right” “We deserve better than this.”
Newspaper headlines read:
“Deadlock brings confusion”
“New Lakers Media Deal Holding People Hostage”
“Limits on TV Coverage Have Fans Upset”
Radio was still available, but how dare anyone suggest that the Lakers fans settle for radio!
Lakers fans had decided what they liked and if that is not what they were given they would act irrationally!
They felt ENTITLED to full access & if they couldn’t have it they were going to pout, grump, & raise a ruckus cause that is what entitlement causes!
So what does this have to do with worship?
Well there was a time in history in which you could enter most Protestant churches and worship would be very similar. There may be a difference in teachings here and there but for the most part worship looked the same and sounded the same and felt the same. I grew-up going to churches and for the most part this is how I saw worship, no matter where a person went in my faith practice worship was the same.
Which is why when I was a 4th grader and the new church Celebration Center burst on the scene it blew everyone’s mind! Some in a good way and some in a bad way.
The music was upbeat, with drums, and electric guitars, there was drama, and powerful altar calls. There was standing room only and sometimes we stood for 20 minutes or more just singing. No more was there just a single hymn then sit down, then stand-up to greet your neighbor, then another hymn though you could sit for that hymn. This was all new, but it was really the only place around in the Adventist faith community that was doing worship like this.
Jump forward to 2012 there is now a lot of different styles of worship within Prostestantism, even within Adventism. More and more church goers have experienced and tasted different varieties of worship. And for the most part we all have defined what type of worship we like and what type we don’t like.
And whereas before we were simply satisfied to be worshiping the God of the universe, now many having experienced something else have decided that worshiping the God of the universe in any context is no longer good enough.
You see many folk have decided that if the pastor preaches something they don’t like, or if the music isn’t what they want, or the length of the service is too long, or too short, there aren’t enough prayers, there are too many prayers, the pastor uses powerpoint, he/she doesn’t use powerpoint, (the list could go on and on…) then they’ll pout, grump, & raise a ruckus. Why? Because no longer is worship just about worship.
Worship has become about what we expect it to be–which is Entitlement Worship–when folk feel they have the right to define what worship is and isn’t. What should be preached and what shouldn’t. Whether a service should be long or short. What instruments are sacred & which are secular.
And for some (which is too many) “worshipers” if any one of these things is not what they expect it to be, like entitled Lakers fans, they act irrationally.
Because that is what entitlement does it moves us away from rational thinking to self-centered thinking which is always irrational!
Now in sports this may not be the biggest deal–isn’t all sports fandom in some way self-centered in the long run anyway.
But in worship, the entitled worshiper may just find that they have the exact worship they want, but in the process they’ve stopped worshiping the God of the Universe and have instead established themselves as the “g”od of their worship.
Be careful before you define a worship or leave a worship simply because you don’t like it.
It may just be that is the very place God can keep your worship more about Him & less about you!
No matter how much you may or may not like it!
While many in North America want to be just like us when it comes to our Educational system, a large percentage of Adventists are abandoning our schools.
Why?
Because of a perceived reality that just isn’t true!
That our schools are less than the best…
Ellen G. White wrote,
““Something better” is the watchword of education, the law of all true living. Whatever Christ asks us to renounce, He offers in its stead something better.” –Education, p. 296.
Adventist Education is that something better! Don’t believe me how ’bout we look at the data? What about what others are saying?
What about this headline taken straight out of the pages of the Los Angeles Times,
Or what about the fact that Martin Doblmeier a non-Adventist award winning producer and director is making a documentary for PBS, (tentatively titled: “Teach the Children Well”) examining the success of Adventist Education.
In a clip I saw of this video there is even a line addressing the fact our own people are not attending our schools, “with all of this proven success, Adventist schools are still shrinking.”
So why is everyone else other than “US” (Adventists) impressed with our schools?
Because of the following data:
A 4 year study was done on Adventist Education. In this study 800+ schools in the United States, Canada, & Bermuda were studied. 51,706 students participated in the study.
And the findings show something amazing!
Our students were ABOVE the National Average in:
ABOVE predicted/expected achievement:
That last line in all red is one of the things that shocked researchers most. Unlike most studies that throw-out the lowest end, those that may qualify as special-ed students. These studies included every single student that attended Adventist schools and found that even our students that were considered special-ed/needs students scored on average above predicted/expected achievement.
Specifically researchers looked at the Sciences as that is considered to be weaker in Adventist schools for two reasons:
So what were the results?
There were differences in the sciences found between the smaller Adventist schools which constitutes more than 60% of our schools (and when they are speaking of smaller they are talking about schools in the elementary level even smaller than Sierra View Junior Academy about 90 students K-8 & comparable to Armona Union Academy for High-School level).
We would expect differences in these areas though–the larger schools were better–wait…what STUNNED researchers:
In every category the differences were consistently in favor of the smaller schools.
In fact the amazing thing about Adventist Education that adds an entirely different level of separation between our school system and every other:
“Students in schools with fewer financial resources do as well as those with more financial resources.”
Think about all the talk in the public arena about the schools that have and those that have not? And the unfair advantage that is available to kids in schools with great financial resources.
In the study of Adventist Ed, there is no distinction. Even our 1 room classrooms with absolutely no science labs, still on average score above the national average in science and all other subjects on national standardized tests.
And the last little detail I want to share with you that has been found in studies addresses a fundamental desire that is in most parents hearts, to see their child have greater opportunities than they themselves had:
It has been found that a child that works their way through our Adventist Educational System will likely advance to a higher socio-economic level than their parents.
The way it was stated is this:
Adventist Education is the only known system by which it is highly-probable that an individual will advance to a higher socio-economic status in ONE GENERATION.
Why?
Because the watchword for Adventist Education is “Something Better.”
This is why PBS is having a documentary made & the Los Angeles Times is doing stories on our educational system. They want to know and understand why.
And maybe we as Adventists, should pause, and take a second look as well.
But here to me is ultimately why we should take a second look at Adventist Education:
“In the highest sense the work of education and the work of redemption are one…” –Ellen G. White, Education, p.30
Our church is in a crisis. More than half of our young people are leaving the church and saying, “No” to the Adventist life and beliefs. This can be thwarted but part of the change comes with connecting to an Adventist school.
You see the Valugenesis study found three key elements to a childs spiritual development. Spirituality and Adventist values taught at home, a quality local church, & attending a quality Adventist school.
Now some people may say, “you see I don’t need the school there is only a 6% difference between the two quality venues and the three quality venues.”
Well, let me just say I hope no one would say that. Let us hope that every parent would say, “even for just a 6% greater opportunity of faith, I would do anything for my child!”
These are the numbers but here is the testimony of more than 81% of students that attended Adventist schools:
“Attending an Adventist school is the most important thing that has helped me develop my religious faith.”
That is the testimony of my life. I accepted Jesus through the influence of my Academy Bible teacher, Pastor Neil Richmund & my Academy peers. I am forever grateful to Spring Valley Academy for the impact that wonderful school had on my life. And more so I am grateful that my parents made the decision from day one that there was no other option for our family, all three of their kids were going to Adventist school whether we liked it or not our entire lives. The schools weren’t perfect and nor were we, my older sister and I went the way of the world for a time, but we had our roots and we are both back walking with the Lord. She teaching in an Adventist Elementary school, and me working as an Adventist pastor. And my little sister praise the Lord never wandered and she recently had the great privilege of enrolling the next generation into an Adventist school, Armona Union Academy.
If you haven’t considered it or you have decided Adventist Education just wasn’t worth it for your family; Will you pause and see past the perception to the reality?
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**The statistics found in this post are from a presentation by Dr. Elissa Kido
Here are the top ten for the month of October. If you haven’t read/watched have a look now. Be blessed and share with a friend!
Appreciated Pastor Dwight Nelson joining us today for our episode of Faster Pastor. I really resonated with much that my three other colleagues shared. I wish we could have recorded what happened after the video went off! Besides David teasing Albert for being Uncle Sam and telling folk to “Go Vote!” it was a lively discussion of four pastors that are acutely aware of the times we are living in and a desire above all else to see Jesus’ love shared with this nation, a flawed nation, but a nation we still all desperately love! Dwight had a beautiful prayer for all of us, that should be prayed over every single believer in this country–“no matter what happens Tuesday, keep us faithful to Jesus!”